Don't Cry

General topics of interest to racers and race coordinators alike.
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gpraceman
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Don't Cry

Post by gpraceman »

I'm sure some of you have seen this before, but many may not. It's a real tear jerker but has a great message :!:

http://tcastle.com/dontcry.html
Randy Lisano
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Awana Grand Prix and Pinewood Derby racing - Where a child, an adult and a small block of wood combine for a lot of fun and memories.
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TDean
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Re: Don't Cry

Post by TDean »

Thanks Randy
Very charming -- I may use this at our Blue & Gold Banquet tomorrow...
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ranman106
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Re: Don't Cry

Post by ranman106 »

That will be in our rules and information packet next year. Thank you!
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Re: Don't Cry

Post by Stephen's Dad »

I will be sharing this. Thank you.

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Splinter Sprinter
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Re: Don't Cry

Post by Splinter Sprinter »

It's also under: Gospel Message Topic, October 19, 2003
I read it every year at the RA workshop to all the newcomers.
It gets them every time.
Pinewood Derby- It’s not the destination, but the journey,for Two-There is no finish line!
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Alex
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Re: Don't Cry

Post by Alex »

Gilbert was right. My dad says that Pinewood is about many things. Winning is one of the least important. win or lose it is how we run the race that counts. I will be homeschooled for a while and for a different kind of treatment my days and nights will be reversed. So look for me on Derby talk for 1/2 hour at night very late. I am going to be well very soon. Alex
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TurtlePowered
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Re: Don't Cry

Post by TurtlePowered »

Alex wrote:Gilbert was right. My dad says that Pinewood is about many things. Winning is one of the least important. win or lose it is how we run the race that counts. I will be homeschooled for a while and for a different kind of treatment my days and nights will be reversed. So look for me on Derby talk for 1/2 hour at night very late. I am going to be well very soon. Alex
We feel a sence of accomplishment of having built something together. Each year I can tell the improvements my son is doing (and I tell him so!).
Get well soon!
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Re: Don't Cry

Post by Gavin Chafin »

I was actively involved in sports when I was in high school. I was very proud of the fact that I learned to lose graciously, but even more importantly that I learned to win graciously. I always made it a point to congratulate and shake the hand of the winning runner(s) (I ran track and cross-country). But, when I would win races, I recall there being several runners who always seemed to “disappear” (with no congratulations being made). But, I never let it deter me. I always felt that if someone did well, that they should be congratulated even if they wouldn’t do the same for me (my wife considers this to be a character flaw in me, but I consider it to be a strength).

I feel that these are important lessons to be learned when it comes to the PWD. After my son got second at our Pack race, I made it a point to shake the hand of the father, and the hand of the boy, who built the winning car. I wanted my son to win, but I was genuinely happy for the boy who won. And, you should’ve seen how proud he was. He held up the car to his dad and said, “Dad, I love this car.”

But, I find that I have a much healthier attitude than most people. I was somewhat disappointed at our District Championships. The crowd barely clapped for the 3 boys (including my son) who won trophies. At Districts, only two people actually congratulated us (other than family, of course), with one of the “congratulations” being, “Gavin, you built a fast car” (a snide remark by another boy’s jealous mother).

After the race, we had one father from our Pack (a den leader) call us to congratulate us (and it was in the local paper that most everyone gets). At our Blue & Gold Banquet, only our next-door neighbor congratulated Garrett on winning Districts. The fact that Garret won Districts was never mentioned at the Blue & Gold Banquet, not even during the awards ceremony for the Pack’s pinewood derby. You would think that the Pack would be proud to be so well-represented at the District Championships. But, I guess not.

In a nutshell, I see a lot of “gaps” in sportsmanship out there. Moral: Parents need to teach their boys how to win and lose graciously. But, and perhaps more importantly, parents need to understand what it takes to win and lose graciously.
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Re: Don't Cry

Post by PWTom »

Gavin, I think a lot has to do with the assumption that fast cars are dad-built cars and the boys had little to nothing to do with it. My son has done very well the past three years in the Pack and I take great pride in the fact that I show my son what to do, I explain why it's important, I help him if he needs steadier hands, but either he does it, or it doesn't get done. However, I think that most parents in the pack believe that I build his cars.

I will readily admit that I do a lot to learn about making a fast pinewood car, but I attempt to transfer that knowledge to my son. I will also admit that we spend a lot of time working on the car, but we generally have a great time doing so, and that's what Pinewood is all about.

I wish there was better "sportsmanship" in our pack, but I think that it is a reflection of current societal mores and the focus on winning. How do we promote better sportsmanship at the den/pack level?
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Re: Don't Cry

Post by terryep »

PWTom wrote:How do we promote better sportsmanship at the den/pack level?
That's the best question I've read on this forum to date.

Terry
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Re: Don't Cry

Post by Gavin Chafin »

terryep wrote:
PWTom wrote:How do we promote better sportsmanship at the den/pack level?
That's the best question I've read on this forum to date.

Terry
Yeah, that’s a really good question and one that I’ve thought about how I could handle at the den level. But, I believe it’s one of those issues that is better handled at the family level. The parents have to instill strong values, including sportsmanship, into their children. And, the best way to accomplish that is to provide positive modeling behavior.

I have a tremendous amount of respect for my high school cross country / track coach. He liked to see our team win, but he was always genuinely happy for the kids/team/coach who won. He would always walk over and shake hands with the winner and he’d have an authentic, huge smile on his face. I always thought this was quite admirable and I guess it’s where I acquired my sportsmanship (via modeling the behavior of someone who I highly respected).

So, I guess you could say that someone has to model the behavior for you in order for you to really understand what sportsmanship is. Someone has to show the children how you react when you win, and how you react when you lose. When you have father’s who swear at the TV because their beloved football team just lost, this is the type of sportsmanship that is instilled in the children. In other words, what the kids learn is that when you lose it’s OK to get upset and fly into a tirade…and When you lose it’s OK to not be happy for the other team (or, with the PWD, child).

I remember a great quote that came from someone at the Olympics. This was quite a few Olympics ago and it was when the Russians were nothing short of intimidating. I recall always rooting against the Russians and hoping they’d lose in every event. One of the announcers said, “Keep in mind folks that each one of these athletes has a mother who loves him dearly and is rooting for him to do well.” That quote had quite an impact on me and made me rethink some of my attitudes. I always keep that quote in the back of my mind.

In a nutshell, when you’re talking about boys this young, positive modeling behavior has to come from the parents in order for it to truly be effective. And when you have parents who are poor sports…well, I guess I really don’t have an answer.
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